I was an assistant.

Because I had not had a true encounter with God, I lost everything. My Salvation, my dignity. Everything happened because of a wrong decision, a temptation. I thought that I was born of God.

I lied to myself during 5 years and I had to lose everything in order to be born of God, just because I was too proud to ask for help. I thought that I was enough of God not to ask for help. And every time I thought about asking for help, the devil would tell me I was fine, it was all in my head.

I got involved with an assistant and we ended up falling into temptation. I felt like the worst person on earth. I didn’t know how to put an end to that sin. He was very dominant, and I didn’t have any more strength.

One day I gathered the last bit of strength I had and I poured out my heart.

I asked God for help, and after all I had done to Him, He helped me.

I spoke to my pastor, and it seemed like a burden was lifted from my back.

Today I am seeking Him more. I feel so much better than before. God has spoken to me. I have asked Him to guide my steps to Him.

I always had a desire to serve on the altar. I dedicated myself to this, and at first, I was even a good assistant. I took care of almost everything in Church, but I didn’t have a real encounter with God.

Today I am starting from scratch. I continue to have the same desire about the altar, but now I am aware. I am going to fight, first, for my Salvation. But because one thing leads to another, those who are saved want to save.

Anonymous

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Crown of life

Bishop, our testimony is like a crown on our head, to glorify the Lord Jesus and show what He can do in the life of those who truly surrender to Him.

However, I believe that only those who had an encounter with the Lord Jesus and have never fallen away have the pleasure of sharing their testimony.

Because, those of us who have fallen away, like me and many others, carry such a great shame that we really only share our testimony to glorify JESUS.

However it’s very embarrassing.

I don’t even understand where my head was at when I decided to turn away from Him.

It left such a mark that, even though I am now saved, it still hurts every time I think about it.

The wound has healed because He loved us. But the scar will never go away because it is part of a past filled with sadness and loneliness that I never want to go through again.

Unfortunately, all of those who have not been sealed are still subject to this.

The shame of having abandoned Him is still great, but the gratitude I have for Him accepting me back is indescribable.

Carlos Mossolim

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They were not called sons

It is so strong that, if we take a closer look, David was not called son; instead he was called “a man after God’s own heart”.

Abraham heard the voice of God three times when he was about to make a sacrifice, but He did not call him son.

Moses had a revelation from God when he saw the burning bush, but he was not called son.

They were all servants of God, feared Him, saw great wonders, but when the subject of faith comes to Jesus, the story changes.

God quickly says: “This is my beloved Son”.

And there is more…

I do not remember reading that the men who came before Jesus called God by Father. They said, “My God”, or “God”.

Wagner Cruz

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My life began to improve

Bishop, up until October 2012 I was in the faith, a candidate as an assistant, about to be lifted up.

I had already been interviewed, but I ended up doing something dumb: I got into a relationship with a girl who wasn’t of the same faith, and to further complicate my life, she lived far away. I started going out with her behind my pastor’s back.

I managed to hide it from him for about 1 month, but he soon found out that I was dating through my social network. He talked to me, explained everything and said, “Why did you do that? You turned your back on Jesus…”

And I simply turned my back and left.

We continued dating.

After that day, my life seemed to “IMPROVE”.

But that was a big mistake.

We dated for five months, to the point where I threw my PURITY out the window for this girl. We slept together every time I went over her house. But I knew that I was not happy, because when I laid my head on the pillow, something whispered in my ear: “Fool, this night your soul will be required of you!” Still, I continued.

Something kept me with her.

Until the day I went up to her and said, “DO YOU AGREE NOT TO HAVE SEX ANYMORE UNTIL WE GET MARRIED?”

Then, the answer she gave me, or rather, the devil accused me with was: “SURE, I AGREE. IT’S WEIRD HOW YOU SEEK YOUR GOD AND THEN YOU COME AND HAVE SEX WITH ME… ”

Wow, it was as though the devil slapped me right across the face!

After this happened, I decided to return to my first love. Leaving her was not easy because I liked her very much. But, on a Wednesday, during the Night of Salvation meeting, I placed her on the altar.

After I made that decision, God accepted me and forgave me for all the wrong I had done, and for having turned away from the Holy Spirit for a girl.

Today I am in the faith again and ready to serve God with all my strength.

PLEASE, DO NOT EXCHANGE GOD FOR SOMETHING “SUPERFLUOUS”.

Junior – Boqueirão – Canoas (RS)

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I lost a lot of time

I also lost a lot of time from my life living for this world, in which the devil reigns.

Since I was a small child, I attended meetings at the Universal Church with my mother and two brothers.

In 2005, my older brother became an assistant. I was about 11 years old.

Despite my young age, I was very active in the Church. My faith was unwavering. I was happy and didn’t even know it.

I felt great pleasure and joy to go to the house of my Lord – whether it was to clean, attend a meeting, accompany my brother, work on the garden of the Church, participate in the TF Teen events, which was called by another name at the time – whatever it was, I was always available and willing to help!

I attended the Church in Paulista Park (on the west end of Sao Paulo), I practically knew everyone. I dreamt of being the Church’s piano player.

I was raised as the ‘head of a tribe’ as soon as I graduated to the Youth Group, but my brother was no longer an assistant then because he sinned and became weak in the faith. Soon after, my sister, who is 4 years older than me, also fell away and stopped coming to Church like she used to. An assistant hurt my feelings by treating me rudely, so I stopped going to that Church and started going to the Church’s headquarters, which are located in the downtown area of my city. But there, because it’s the headquarters and it’s so much bigger, I didn’t get all the attention I got at the other Church, so I started attending the meetings and rushing straight home.

Soon, I fell away. I would only go on some Sundays, and as time passed, my live sank deeper and deeper. I began dating, smoking cigarettes, being promiscuous, drinking; doing things that I regret very much. I did things that I never thought I would. I even slept with someone of the same sex – I slept with her and I almost fell in love with her. I almost turned gay – my life was at the bottom of the pit.

I would cry whenever I was alone. An emptiness and sadness came over me, but I didn’t have the strength or courage to ask God for forgiveness. I felt embarrassed before God – I had lost my Father. Until one day, God sent a young girl from the Church and she helped me a lot, and continues helping me until today.

Today I am happy.

I am a calmer person.

I no longer feel those anxieties, I enjoy going to the House of the LORD. I love going to the Youth Group meetings and surrounding myself with the things of God.

I decided to really change on 03/18/13, and from then on God has blessed me very much, and will continue to bless me more each day!

I am grateful to Him for loving me and never giving up on me – even though I was the worst, and for forgiving me and giving me so many chances. I will never turn away from His presence again. Never!

Thank you, Bishop, for your messages and “The Holy Spirit” book, which also helped me a lot.

God bless you more and more.

Carolina Sayuri

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Before the altar, but away from God

Bishop, I am an assistant and I was meditating about the title of your message: “The pain of being separated from God”.

You know Bishop, the worst pain of all is to be separated from God while still in His House, doing His Work. Truly, those who separated (physically) from Him one day had already been separated from Him (spiritually) for a long time.

When someone is physically separated from God, they stop going to church. But when they separate spiritually, they stop having an intimate relationship with Him (which is worse).

This was my case.

It was a horrible experience that I do not wish on anyone. It’s stronger than physical pain (since the pain of the flesh passes); it’s a pain in the soul that does not go away after a few days. It is a constant pain in our inner most being, a pain that no medicine can “relieve” (since no type of medicine is able to reach the soul).

It’s like a black hole, an endless black hole.

I passed through this even though I was an assistant (which means that it’s not because we hold a “position” in the Church that we won’t turn away from God if we are not vigilant).

To many, I was still full of light. Though, to me I was in complete darkness, to the point of thinking about committing suicide.

Yes, Bishop, putting an end to my life so that this pain would end once and for all. How blind was I? I was far from God, even though I was so close physically.

How could this be?

A lack of communion, a lack of vigilance, a lack of fear and sacrifice.

But today, thanks to His mercy, I’m back. But not physically, since I never walked away from His house. I am truly back to God, and He has come back to me.

Today I can say that I had a real encounter with God and I never want to feel the pain of separation again, because I couldn’t bear to go through that again.

Being separated from my Lord? I can’t even imagine this happening again.

Unfortunately, I can’t help but think of how many people are in the same situation that I was one day. They are close to His Work, to His House, but at the same time, they are separated from God.

May God have mercy on us!

Jessica Naoko

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Four months in hell

Thank God for His mercy, and the glory of the second house, which has most certainly been greater than the first in my life and my wife’s life.

I remember when I came to Church on Sunday, 06/07/2009.

After being arrested, I decided to surrender my life to God, because my mom had fought for me during all of my life.

I gave myself wholeheartedly, and soon came the desire to be an assistant, to care for people, help others. When my phone rang and it was a pastor or an assistant, I would be so happy because I knew God was calling me.

My wife and I met when we were still young. We were raised as candidates, assistants and after some time our relationship received the pastor’s blessing.

Over time, the desire we had to serve God on the altar began dying because we stopped placing God in first place and started seeing things in a different aspect. It was horrible when we fell into sin and she became pregnant. It was as though we were dirty inside and out. We felt ashamed whenever we went to Church, because the devil made us think that everyone was looking and talking about us. It was four months of hell. Even though we were in Church, we were struggling to get back up.

That’s when I stopped giving my tithe.

Our marriage was completely destroyed. There were many fights, insults and even physical abuse. But when we opened our closet and saw our uniforms, we thought about how many people we fought for while dressed in that armor, how many young people I helped, how many Sundays we arrived early to counsel people… But no, I was wrong. We prayed and it seemed like God didn’t hear us. Our finances were miserable.

That’s when we decided, “Either it is or it isn’t! Either God transforms our lives, starting with our interior, or we are going to end up in hell!” That is when we decided to ACT, so that there could be a REACTION from God.

We surrendered our lives. I began being faithful to God again, and during the first Fast of Daniel we put all our strength in to actually being born of God.

Today, thank God, I can say that we are happy.

Together, we returned to the Work of God. With lots of honor, we take care of the YPG work in the Church headquarters in Marilia – Brazil, and you can be sure of one thing:

IT IS GOING TO EXPLODE!

Johnny Henrique

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I do not love my husband

I’ve heard many beautiful testimonies. But this one moved me deeply. I have a desire to have a real encounter with God. I became aware that I had never had an encounter with Him, and I needed to be born again. Because of my anxiety and fear of being alone, thinking that God did not see me or hear me, I began dating and married a person who was not a Christian.

I must confess that I am the unhappiest person in the world. I have a profound sadness inside me. I don’t have peace, I have insomnia and I cry a lot. My heart is like stone. I often curse. I have great sorrow and depression. I’m full of illnesses such as diabetes and high blood pressure. I feel like garbage, I have no self-esteem.

I ask God for forgiveness so much…

I feel guilty about everything. I always say to God: “Lord, none of this is Your fault. It’s my fault for not listening to You!” I’ve been to several other churches, but I feel like that’s not my place. I miss Wednesdays and Sundays, when I would seek God.

I go to the Universal Church on Tuesdays, but my heart is no longer the same towards God. I feel very dirty. I do not love my husband. I always tell him that I want to get a divorce because we aren’t even intimate anymore. I don’t even miss being intimate with him, but he gets nervous and very angry. I am writing because I don’t have the courage to tell this to anyone face to face.

Patricia

A collection of articles from Bishop Macedo blog